It was only the third date with my boyfriend last week. I messaged him, “I am on my way to your dorm room.” He immediately replied, “Awesome, I will see you soon! I have a surprise for you.” Elated with joy, and butterflies swarming in my tummy, I started pacing faster to his dorm, and constantly kept thinking about the surprise that he had for me. As soon as I entered his room, I saw it. I saw it right on his dresser and there lay – a bright red rose –carefully packed in a thin transparent sheet. Quite naturally, I gave a big smile and thanked him with a hug. I didn't express it, but I knew what I was feeling. I had never imagined someone giving me a rose before, and that was the day that I received my very first rose. I thought "what is so big in a rose?" no, for me, it was more than just A Rose.
I loved that moment. I loved, love, and will continue to love it going forward. This relationship has been one of the most important relationships in my life since I have not only discovered love, but also found a best friend who understands, supports, motivates, and encourages me through my academic and career goals. The gifted rose was an indication that this one is a keeper, not only as a boyfriend, but as my closest companion. This instance brought so much joy and happiness that I had never imagined. Small acts of love and romantic gestures impress me to a great extent, that I can never let go of those moments. As a hopeless romantic that I am, I realized how madly I was in love with the idea of "surprising someone you love with flowers." More specifically, red roses are my favorite flowers of them all. To me, red roses are symbolic of the deep, intense romantic emotional connections attached and the strong visual appeal and attraction that they have when they meet a pair of eyes. My emotions, thoughts, and personal connections with flowers have become stronger and more grounded over the course of my relationship. I have now come to realize that flowers were always something that I was fond of, appreciative of, but never took an initiate to go out and "see flowers" or even think about it in an average day of life.
Personally, this is not the only instance where roses, or in fact flowers have been involved. On my 20th birthday this year, my parents sent me a surprise bouquet of flowers that they ordered online and asked to be delivered between a specific time frame to my dorm room. In 2013, I and a couple of my other friends were in New Delhi, India as part of a Model United Nations Conference where two of my best (boy) friends sent me roses with a little note with them. We didn't have a crush on each other or anything, we just cracked jokes after for they were so thoughtful and appreciative of me. As I talk about these, both instances, outside of the cliché love and romance, have had a deep impact on my life. Questions like: How did they decide to send flowers? Why did my two best (boy) friends even gift those to me? Are there any underlying emotions that they all had? Why did they do this?, floated inside my head. On the face value, I am convinced that the intent behind my parents' actions was to show their love and care for me --their first child who only visits them twice a year, and stays at home for about 3 months at the most. As for my friends, I believe that their intent was not romantic, but kind and appreciative of our long-lasting friendship.
Generally, the act of "receiving flowers" is something that pleases my heart and gives me an unsurmountable level of happiness, and makes me appreciative and thankful of the giver. I feel obliged to reciprocate to him/her taking out time to give me flowers. Perhaps, this strongly has to do with flowers becoming more traditional, and old-schooled, due to their limited presence around us, and with virtual media and digitization becoming over-popular and highly recommended and emphasized. Flowers have had a special place in my heart and I am grateful for my parents, my two best (boy) friends, and my boyfriend for having sent me flowers since those will always be memorable, special and dear to my heart.
However, flowers are perceived differently in a general sense. Not everyone thinks about flowers every day. Some feel that they hold no meaning - they are just plants that grow and eventually die. Some might find them romantic but need to be contextualized to think about them as romantic elements. Others have already been so absorbed into the digitalized world and wouldn't even imagine flowers being used today to impress their partners. Some might assume flowers to be significant only at funerals and in times of distress. Some might even have flowers every day for purposes of decoration and pleasant odor. The concept of fake flowers or potpourri is another form of decorating your house. Some might even have flowers that they received from their loved ones hidden in a book to be used as bookmarks in the future. See this? Flowers can be imagined in almost any situation that contrasts and/or greatly differs from one another. It is weirdly funny and inquisitive for one to wonder how flowers take different turns in each of our lives, but as transient as they are, they never really come and go in our lives: meaning, that we are born with them around us and when we die, they are still there around us. They continue to live their transient lives forever.
Historically, flowers have held several cultural and traditional connotations that have made their presence at significant events such as weddings and funerals a necessity rather than a choice. In traditional Catholic weddings, the bride holds a bouquet of her favorite flowers while walking down the aisle, and there are flower girls that spread petals of flowers on the floor before she walks in. On the other hand, people express condolences using bouquets of white flowers to symbolize peace. On the contrary, in Hindu weddings, flowers are more likely to be used in clothing and eye-catching decoration as you explore through my project. Cultural and ethnic standards have become more so normalized than simply traditions that it challenges me to strongly believe in my personal beliefs and value in flowers as being romantic tokens of love and affection.
BUT,
Are flowers the only romantic element that can be used to impress your significant other? Are flowers the only material objects gifted to your loved ones? Does the transient nature of flowers take you to explore the immortality of another strong romantic element: jewelry?
